Dear Driver,
If you are waiting on my parking space, you need to wait for me to safely load and buckle my three children in my car. Stop honking. Stop gesturing. Stop tapping your watch.
Stop being a jack-o-loser.
Find another parking spot, or put on your blinker, put your car in park and chill the heck out.
Yes, I have a stroller that takes me several tries to fold. I do in fact plan on transferring all $200 of my groceries from my cart to my car. Call me crazy, but since I bought them I want to bring them home. Yes, my toddler may have a diaper that needs changing, or a thirst that needs quenching, or a song that needs finding.
Sometimes it will appear that I am ready to back out, but then a child’s need will provoke a cruel “fake out.” The brake lights may come on and I might have to run around to other side of the car to sort out a seat belt.
This is not done purposely to make you late or disrupt your life. I’m just living mine like the breeder I am.
After I finally begin to back out and give you your highly-anticipated space, please refrain from yelling or mouthing rude words or performing any obscene gestures. I must keep my own language and behavior rated for general audiences, so your one-sided rumble is a wimp move.
Remember: there’s a good chance that my minivan has a DVD player inside. Screw with me and I’m liable to pull back into the space, open up that newly-purchased Pirate’s Booty and settle us all in for The Sound of Music.
The 45th Anniversary version.
So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen,
The mom who didn’t give you the finger in the Whole Foods parking lot
Does this happen to you in crowded parking lots? With three kids in a metro area, it happens to me all the time. I feel like mooning them. What do you do?
Comments
Thien-Kim
Yes! I make them wait, I don’t care how long they glare at me.
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Corey Feldman
That totally pisses me off. I think I get it a bit less because I am man, but its happened a couple of times. And I had to bite my tongue with the kids there. People can be so rude
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LeidaM
AMEN! sista’ AMEN!
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sara
It happens to me all the time. I just ignore them. I figure if they wait long enough maybe they will drive off and find someone else to be annoyed by!
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JenniferG
“Screw with me and I’m liable to pull back into the space, open up that newly-purchased Pirate’s Booty and settle us all in for The Sound of Music. The 45th Anniversary version.” - BEST. LINE. EVER.
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ursula
Oh my goodness, that was hilarious and as usual from you - right on the nose. I take my time…sometimes, it makes me want to go slower.
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Elaine
I smile back at them and wave as if they are gesturing nicely to me. I do this when I’m in traffic and someone honks at me as well. I want them to know “I know you’re there - I knew you were there all along. My life is so full of awesome (even if it needs buckling in, fed, and otherwise attended to), I can’t help but share my happiness.”
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Thrift store mama
I smile and wave gesturing at the kids and hold up my hand showing all five fingers so as to indicate that I’ll be about 5 minutes or so.
But if someone gestured or tapped their watch, I can GUARANTEE that I’d get in the car and settle in for the long haul !
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Sirena
Super rude. As the designated “waiter for the spot” that I usually am in this case, when I watch a busy parent load kid(s), stroller and assorted stuff into her minivan, I usually nod and smile to show that I know it will be awhile, and always shout out the window an offer to help JUST in case the person might welcome an extra pair of hands, or someone to run the cart back to the cart area - not to rush the mom or dad, but acting out of what I hope someone would do for me if I was in a flustered rush.
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LeidaM Reply:
May 31st, 2012 at 5:30 pm
@Sirena,
Aw this is so nice of you.
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Vicky
This post is the best! It happens to me all the time. Wegmans is the worst for it. I’m already cranky from dealing with three under 6 in the store and then they are cranky and you throw in some (love this term of yours!) jack-o-loser who wants my spot on the spot and I get a bit pissy.
Last week a woman actually rolled down her window and said, “If you are going to take a while I will move on.” Um, really?! You think? PLEASE DO!!!
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